The hell of shopping for jeans!

I hope you had a happy easter and that you haven’t overdosed on chocolate as I have?

It’s the same story every year- I tell everyone to buy me something other than chocolate, I then panic that I’m not going to have any chocolate, so tell everyone to buy Mr. R chocolate…which I then scoff!

I now need a pair of FAT jeans!

Jeans shopping= NIGHTMARE.

It’s up there with swimwear shopping and sticking hot pins in your eyes for a fun day out! So just how do you end up looking like Brooke Shields in her Calvin’s?

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Oh lets be honest, In my dreams this is possible, in my reality it most probably is not!

But with a bit of hard work and a lot of determination, finding the right pair of jeans, hidden amongst the many brands, cuts, colours and washes, is absolutely a feasible feat.

How to find the perfect pair of jeans…

  • Knowing the proportion of your body is important. Are you long in the body or short?  If you have a long body then you need to trick the eye into giving you longer legs, so buy slightly higher waisted jeans. Likewise, if you are short in the body and have a large bust, a high waist is only going to accentuate this. Go for a mid-rise waist.
  • Buy jeans that feel almost uncomfortably tight when you try them on. We’re not talking passing out tight here but the waistband should dig in slightly and you should need to breathe in to do them up! They always give once you start to wear them.
  • Always check your rear view in the mirror! Pockets positioning and size is crucial – Too low and you may create yourself a saggy backside, too wide apart and you’ve managed to add inches!
  • Consider having your jeans altered. This is not unusual, maybe you’ve found the perfect pair but the waist needs altering or the hem needs taking up.
  • Remember that dark denim is the most slimming colour.
  • Make sure you take the right footwear with you. If you are buying boot cut or flares then have a pair of heels handy.

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So now that you’ve found the Holy Grail of jeans, how do you care for them…?

  • Buy the shop up, failing that, buy a couple of pairs at least!!
  • Jeans are supposed to shape to your body and when you wash them they lose that. However I can not wear my jeans for 6 months without washing them…euckk! If, like me you must wash them, try to do it as little as possible and do it as follows…
  • Turn inside out and wash in cold water (30° is hot) line dry them, do not tumble dry.
  • If you can be bothered, try this little known Japanese method; which apparently entails filling your bath with 6″ of room temperature water and then jumping in whilst wearing your jeans.

Not too sure about that last one…

I can’t say that being armed with the above is going to make jeans shopping any less depressing, (you’ve got to kiss a few frogs before you find your prince!) but it may help lead you to success eventually!

Wish me luck, I’m off to try and find a flattering pair of boyfriend jeans…

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Until next time…


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